Self-trust is one of the most important aspects of being an entrepreneur. You have to have faith in your own abilities and know that you are capable of achieving great success even if it doesn’t seem like it at the moment. Self-trust is ultimately your ability to trust that you will survive a situation while practicing kindness towards yourself and others, not perfection. It’s not trusting yourself to know all of the right actions, or know that you will always do the right thing. However, it is knowing that you will have the conviction to show up and play the game of life, while giving yourself grace. It’s not easy. In fact, many days it can seem really easy to beat yourself up and drop the word “should” all over what you are (and aren’t) doing in the moment. But, self-trust and self-confidence are skills that can be built, just like any other. And with enough practice and determination, you will thrive both personally and in business.
What Does Self-Trust Really Mean?
Self-trust is all about the firm resilience of your integrity. What does that mean? Keeping your word. If you say you’re going to do something, whether it’s to yourself or others, you get to keep that promise rather than letting it slide.
Self-trust is also about being able to hold yourself accountable. It means accepting when you’re wrong, and not only apologizing when you mess up but also making the necessary corrections so that it doesn’t happen again (and if it does, giving yourself a pass for not being perfect this time, as long as you make it right with any other people involved). It’s also about being honest with yourself when things don’t go well or when someone needs to hear something difficult.
If you put the work in, in the end you’ll win big. Get comfortable with how you show up every day, and know that you are worth it. Practicing self-trust daily while being kind towards yourself and others is how you grow this skill. It’s not always easy, but the more you do it, the easier it gets and the better you feel about yourself when it comes to showing up each day and leaning in to what your heart desires.
Why You Need to Trust Yourself First
I’ve never met an entrepreneur who is overly-confident and brimming with self-trust, but I have met a lot of entrepreneurs who give up because they don’t trust themselves. It’s easy to get confused when you’re in the hustle and bustle of business growth. You start questioning your next steps and feel like you’re going a million miles an hour trying to keep things together. How can you make time for yourself while also making sure everything else is moving forward? It’s easy to fall prey to not trusting yourself in this scenario, but there are ways around it.
One of the most important parts of self-trust is being able to know that you will survive a situation. For example, if you’re stressed with work or at home and feel like it’s unbearable, don’t try to fix the problem immediately. Instead, give yourself space by doing something that helps you relax more (I personally love reading in bed while sipping tea before I go to sleep). It’s easy to think that your situation is catastrophic and you need to fix it now. However, if you allow yourself space, even 15 minutes, you will likely find new energy and come up with solutions when your mind clears a bit.
The truth is that we all let ourselves down sometimes. It’s how we bounce back that matters. When you do something to disappoint yourself, like forget an important appointment or turn in a project late, give yourself grace. You are perfect, whole, and complete even with all your flaws, and from here on out consider every mistake as practice for your next success rather than proof of failure. When you start to notice that you’re slipping into not trusting yourself, give yourself an extra pep talk and remind yourself why you deserve it.
Don’t Undermine Yourself
Regret and shame are the killers of your self-trust and integrity. I’m not a big fan of thinking too much about past mistakes unless they can help you learn to do things differently in the present and future, but those thoughts should always be balanced with positive affirmations that remind you who you are at your core.
It’s easy to fall into patterns of negative self-talk that impact everything from how you show up to your job, how you treat others and even the way you feel about yourself. Your inner dialogue is a powerful force, so if you find yourself undermining your abilities, take a moment and recognize it for what it is: self-sabotage. Then, work towards changing this pattern by practicing affirmations that you deserve love and respect.
However, don’t run away from your inner-critic either. It’s important to understand why our little voices say the things they do, relate to them, and then educate them. When we stand up to them in this way, a positive relationship with our inner-critic is possible. You can recognize their protective nature while also addressing those fears head-on.
This is easier said than done and you may need a coach to help you heal at first, but the more you practice understanding and listening to your inner-critic, the less power it has over you. That’s when self-trust will start bubbling up and you will truly be unstoppable.
How to Build Your Self-Esteem
It can feel like a constant battle to keep your self-trust alive, so how do you build it when everything seems stacked against you? Start by taking time each day to slow down and truly appreciate the beauty in the small moments. When you pause from all of life’s busyness, you’ll be able to get in touch with what really matters and keep your focus on what’s truly important.
We can get so caught up in our problems that we lose sight of the beautiful things surrounding us, and this includes yourself. You are a work-in-progress, but you also have so much to offer! Every day that you wake up alive is worth being grateful for. Consider getting a gratitude journal and write down at least three things you’re grateful for each day.
Coaching can also help you learn how to love and trust yourself. Many people who come to me for coaching are very hard on themselves, but what they don’t realize is that their self-criticism actually makes them feel worse rather than better. When you have a coach that’s rooting for your success, it’s much easier to find the motivation you need to push your self-doubt aside and go after what you want. Are you ready to trust yourself again? Let’s dive deeper into self-trust together. Book your breakthrough call today!